Quiz: Are We Talking About The Hawk, The Dink, or Stick?

Photo-Illustration: Vulture; Photos: Apple TV, Colleen E Hayes/Netflix

The sports-comedy bro-downs have metastasized. Previously contained by Happy Madison and the occasional Gary Sánchez outing, we’re now inundated by comedies about the leisurely arts. Both Netflix’s The Hawk (starring Will Ferrell) and Apple TV’s Stick (starring Owen Wilson) are golf-coms starring members of what used to be called the Frat Pack. Occupying the same press cycle as The Hawk is Jake Johnson’s The Dink. Like Stick, it is also an Apple TV joint. The Wilson brothers are spread across these three properties as are SNL alums like Molly Shannon, Chris Parnell, and Chloe Fineman.

Do you really expect me to keep these eerily similar monosyllabic projects straight in my head, Apple TV and Netflix? Did the Frat Packers not have a barbecue and realize they were falling prey to parallel thinking? I put it to you that these two TV shows and a movie overlap so much the Venn diagram of them may as well be a circle. Can you keep these three properties distinct in your head? Take this quiz to prove it.

Is It The Hawk, The Dink, or Stick

We give you a statement, you tell us whether it refers to Will Ferrell’s The Hawk, Jake Johnson’s The Dink, or Owen Wilson’s Stick.

Keith David dies in the first episode.

Correct! This is the inciting incident of Netflix’s The Hawk.

Sorry, this is the inciting incident of Netflix’s The Hawk.

In a refreshing gender flip, the 25-year age-gap maybe-romance is Older Girl/Younger Guy.

Jake Johnson gets flirty with Will Ferrell’s Step Brothers co-star Mary Steenburgen in The Dink.

Jake Johnson gets flirty with Will Ferrell’s Step Brothers co-star Mary Steenburgen in The Dink.

This is the one about pickleball.

Correct, The Hawk and Stick are golf-centered, while The Dink takes on the new retirement sport, pickleball.

Nope! The Hawk and Stick are golf-centered, while The Dink takes on the new retirement sport, pickleball.

This show has characters named “Santi” and “Zero Duffy.”

Yes, whereas The Hawk has someone named “Golden Fisk.” Normal names all around.

No, this is Stick. The Dink has “Dusty” and “Skip,” and The Hawk has someone named “Golden Fisk.” Normal names all around.

Produced by Ben Stiller, star of Zoolander, alongside Owen Wilson and Will Ferrell.

Will Ferrell’s The Hawk

Jake Johnson’s The Dink

Owen Wilson’s Stick

Inexplicably, Stiller produced the one not starring his former co-stars.

Inexplicably, Stiller produced the one not starring his former co-stars.

Co-stars Luke Wilson.

Despite being brothers with Stick’s Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson is in The Hawk. He plays the caddish villain, a role that — way back when — would be played by Dink producer Ben Stiller.

Despite being brothers with Stick’s Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson is in The Hawk. He plays the caddish villain, a role that — way back when — would be played by Dink producer Ben Stiller.

We’ll give you three actors, you tell us which two shows they’re in: Chloe Fineman, Patton Oswalt, Billy Zane.

Hick (Hawk and Stick)

Dik (Dink and Hawk)

Stink (Stick and Dink)

Shocker! Two are in The Dink; one is in the Stick.

Shocker! Two are in The Dink; one is in the Stick.

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