No one is trying to make Atlanta’s new era work as much as Porsha.
Photo: Bravo
Production has tried to usher in a new era for RHOA over the last three seasons, and so far, K. Michelle seems to be the push Atlanta needed to make it through the transition. Her fresh contributions to the show bookend the jam-packed episode, beginning with her bemused reactions to Porsha and Kelli’s shady tea time conversation (I also loved that video of her wig falling off after Porsha’s event) and closing with her opening up about hasty booty injections. You read that right; gone are the days of denying any aesthetic work outside a basic nip and tuck, now we’re openly discussing the consequences of putting silicone in an already thick ass. It’s very modern-day Atlanta, to say the least.
Porsha’s also putting in the work to bring the show into modernity through debuting her newest identity as an open member of the queer community. Out of all the cities, Porsha is perhaps the Housewife who has evolved the most during her time on the show. She’s gone from demure homemaker to Princess of Thotlandia to sexually fluid divorcee before our eyes. This last part has surely been latent from the beginning, with Porsha herself calling her sexuality a “worst kept secret.” There’s nothing wrong with Porsha taking her sweet time to come out of the closet — even if the walls of said closet were glass — but the disconnect comes from her years of slinging homophobic insinuations at her castmates and their husbands (remember her comments about Kim Field’s man?).
Will Porsha ever take real accountability for the damaging statements she made in the past? Probably not, but let’s take some wins as we go. The Real Housewives franchise is rife with homoerotic tensions, with the cliche “Have you ever swam in the lady pond?” line of questioning appearing in virtually every city. As Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya wrote, the show is “about performing femininity in specific ways, and it’s fascinating that the longer a franchise has been on, the more we see the Housewives start to question some of the roles and expectations they’ve been slotted into.” This quote sums up the transformation we’ve seen Porsha go through as she becomes more comfortable in her womanhood. The journey has surely been flawed, but this transition to being open about the fluidity of her sexuality is somewhat unprecedented in Housewives’ history. We got a taste of it with Kyle Richards, but she won’t fully take the plunge the way Porsha does in tonight’s episode.
Porsha brings her latest suitor, an Atlanta entrepreneur named Sway, to Drew’s movie premiere, introducing her to the group as her “friend.” However, we know that by the end of filming, it will develop into a full-blown relationship. Porsha, Angela, and Phaedra support Drew’s latest B-movie, which also stars RHOA one-and-done cast member Claudia Jordan. This is no shade to them; you can make some money off these flicks, just ask Kenya Moore. Plus, based on Ralph somehow kicking Drew out of the house amidst the divorce proceedings (I guess he was playing the long game by squatting in the basement), Drew is doing the right thing by keeping up her hustle. While the actual movie is inconsequential, Angela makes the most out of the event by both moving forward with Phaedra, who should thank her for giving her another millisecond to add to her five minutes of screentime, and stirring the pot between Porsha and Kelli by relaying Kelli’s dissatisfaction with their last interaction.
Porsha might be shifting in terms of her dating preferences, but some things about P. Willy will never change — she’ll still take a shot at a cast member, usually while speaking half-truths out of her ass, and then find a way to twist herself into the role of a victim. It’s amazing to watch in real time, especially after her lazy performance last season. Messy Porsha, we’ve been waiting for you! This time, she performs her routine during a trip to a tea shop by calling out Kelli for allegedly sleeping with a married man while K. Michelle throws a documentary-style look directly into the camera. It’s payback for Kelli harping on the origins of Porsha’s relationship with Simon, and Porsha does it in her typical fashion. Porsha positions herself as being better than Kelli by warning her that she could have spilled her tea… and then proceeds to do just that.
According to Porsha, Kelli hooked up with some man who immediately changed his clothes and met with his wife. Then, to add a cherry on top, Porsha claims that in a post-coital conversation, Kelli got on the phone and proceeded to talk about Porsha’s baby daddy, Dennis. Porsha says she learned this information via a text from an anonymous friend who heard it from the married man himself. It’s all very convoluted and reminiscent of her now-famous sit-down with Kandi, where she attempted to spill Kandi’s tea. To make matters worse, Porsha claims the only receipt she needs is her word, as if she’s known as a reliable narrator and not the “Who said that?” girl.
Once it’s clear that the situation is essentially he-said-she-said drama, K. Michelle de-escalates by urging the two to squash it with a toast and a hug. Still, Kelli leaves the tea still stewing despite the giant grin plastered on her face as she embraces Porsha. Kelli then meets with Shamea and Angela for a shopping trip and vents about Porsha’s accusations, proving that the hug between them absolved absolutely nothing. She goes on to call her “Whore-sha,” and though she admits she didn’t say it to Porsha’s face, Angela does the Lord’s work — I know production loves her, she’d better carry that bone! — and fixes the problem by bringing the nickname back to Porsha at Drew’s premiere. Porsha calls Kelli a fake-ass bitch and declines the invitation to the opening of her new Nana’s Chicken and Waffles location.
Meanwhile, K. Michelle is in Nashville to celebrate Black country artist Rissi Palmer at the Academy of Country Music Honors. What starts as a milestone moment ends in chaos when an open wound from illegal silicone injections in her ass gets infected. Her reenactment of the medical emergency is gnarly, and I wasn’t expecting to hear about the dark side of BBL culture on RHOA. But hey, this is the reality of what’s going on in Atlanta as plastic surgery becomes more prevalent, and I’m proud of her for being open about the dangers of these procedures. Hopefully, it’ll prevent at least one viewer from doing something reckless in the pursuit of impossible beauty standards.
Back in Atlanta, Porsha makes sure her absence from Kelli’s opening is as loud as possible by sending flowers with a cryptic message that reads “Congratulations, Kelli! P.S. Need to talk.” Since Porsha has obviously drawn her weapon, Kelli fights back by telling the table about the messy conversation at their tea party. Cynthia proceeds to call Porsha, and Angela grabs the phone, executing an amazing assist like her baller husband, and forces Porsha to speak directly to Kelli. Kelli tells her the bouquet she sent is “all broken up,” and that they were “broken flowers from a broken person.” Yikes.
Angela’s choice to add fuel to Kelli and Porsha’s beef instead of merely picking a side is indicative of the game of musical chairs the ladies are playing as they feel out the new season. Alliances are shifting as Angela and Phaedra make up, Kelli and Pinky clear the air, and even Shamea and Drew come to an understanding (I cackled at Drew almost starting in with Mama Morton about her daughter; that girl will cut up with anyone). The event ends with Drew and Shamea attempting to officially bury the hatchet with a little biblical encouragement from Mama Morton, who hilariously instructs them to “tell the devil he’s a liar.” Eventually, they come to a stalemate out of pure exhaustion from talking in circles.
I selfishly enjoy the group’s ability to remain flexible because that means more fresh drama for us as the dynamics shift, rather than beating a dead horse and dragging the same storyline out over multiple episodes. With the leftover drama from last season put to rest, we can focus on the snowballing rift between Kelli and Porsha, and, more importantly, officially moving into this new era of RHOA.
• Someone do a wellness check on Apollo Nida! Sweet baby Ayden should not be your designated driver!
• Claudia Jordan isn’t the only thing from this episode that feels like something production found on the cutting room floor. What the hell is up with these taglines? Most of them sound like throwaways from a brainstorming session, or worse… ChatGPT suggestions.
• Pinky has her first solo scene tonight as she welcomes us into her home for a candid conversation with her husband. I don’t love hearing him say he “humbled” her, while in the same sentence admitting to not supporting her in her lowest moment. Why does he feel that Pinky forces him to “level up,” yet it’s his job to bring her down? We’ll see how this plays out as we get to know them more, but I definitely appreciate Pinky’s transparency about her business issues.
• I know I said I would judge K. Michelle objectively, but I’m not immune to my Bravo group chats. A TikTok of K reading Gizelle and Robyn (I’m still laughing at calling Robyn a “couch potato”) fell into my lap, leading me to her comments about being previously in love with a famously incarcerated R&B singer. K, please do not fumble your time on the most revered network by failing to recognize that sometimes it’s okay to say nothing. Stick to reading the girls, K. Please leave that man in the past!
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